On Mondays during in the fall, the conversation is so dominated by NFL football that the expression “Monday morning quarterback” has entered the vernacular. The phrase is defined by Google as “a person who passes judgment on and criticizes something after the event.” With the popularity of fantasy football, we now have Monday morning quarterbacks talking about football from two different perspectives. We want you to be able to participate in this great tradition, so all fall we’ll be running NFL One Liners on Monday. Use these tiny synopses throughout the day:
Week 11
Sunday, November 16, at 1:00 p.m. ET
Houston Texans 23, at Cleveland Browns 7
The Texans spent their bye week preparing a new quarterback to start this game against the Browns. Meanwhile, their starting running back missed the game with a groin injury. No worries, they won easily.
Line: The Browns look good on paper but they’ve played a very easy schedule so far. Get ready for heart break in Cleveland.
Atlanta Falcons 19, at Carolina Panthers 17
The Falcons are now tied for first place in the NFC South division with four wins and six losses. The Panthers have lost five games in a row and are only one game back with three wins, seven losses, and a tie.
Line: This division is awful!
Minnesota Vikings 13, at Chicago Bears 21
After being humiliated last weekend on national television, the Chicago Bears came out and… well… still looked kinda shaky but they won at least.
Line: Beating the Vikings is better than losing to the Vikings, but it’s not anything to write home about.
Cincinnati Bengals 27, at New Orleans Saints 10
Welp, If it weren’t for the aforementioned terribleness of the NFC South division that the Saints are in with the Panthers, Falcons, and Buccaneers, it would be time to write off this Saints team. As is, it’s enough to say they aren’t playing up to the standard they set in the last few years.
Line: The Saints are so bad, even the Bengals can beat them.
Denver Broncos 7, at St. Louis Rams 22
When this game was almost over, I, like every other person who writes about football in the world, was anxiously checking to see what I had written and how sheepish I was going to have to be today.
Line: It’s actually not so bad, here was the Good Cop, Bad Cop preview for this game.
Good cop: The Rams are one of those teams that plays to the level of their competition! That means they will play extremely well in this game because that’s how good the Broncos are!
Bad cop: At 3-6, I think even you have to admit that the Rams play at least a little bit below the level of their competition.
Seattle Seahawks 20, at Kansas City Chiefs 24
The conclusion from this game has to be that the Chiefs are for real and the Seahawks aren’t. We’ll see how foolish that seems three weeks from now, but for now, that’s what to say.
Line: The Chiefs are for real and the Seahawks aren’t.
San Francisco 49ers 16, at New York Giants 10
Man, the 49ers were lucky to win this game. They kept trying (not really, but it seemed that way) to give the Giants the win, but the Giants quarterback, Eli Manning, just kept throwing interceptions — five in all.
Line: Eli Manning throws five interceptions and the 49ers only win by six points? Not impressive.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 27, at Washington Redskins 7
Both these teams are terrible. The difference might be, that even coming into yesterday with only one win, the Buccaneers could still be harboring playoff hopes in their division where the best team only has four wins!
Line: I can’t wait to hear what the sports radio people in D.C. are going to say about their team today.
SUNDAY, November 16, AT 4:05 and 4:25 P.M. ET
Oakland Raiders 6, at San Diego Chargers 13
A win is a win, but after starting the year so impressively, Chargers fans have got to be anxiously shaking their heads following this ugly game.
Line: The Raiders are still winless, but if they could play the Chargers over and over again, you’d think they’d win a game pretty quickly. The Chargers don’t look good anymore.
Detroit Lions 6, at Arizona Cardinals 14
Hey, cool! In a matchup of two very good, very defensive teams, their game actually turned out to be good and low-scoring. The Cardinals did all their scoring in the first quarter and then hung on to win.
Line: The Super Bowl is in Arizona this year and the Cardinals are serious about becoming the first “real home team” in NFL history.
Philadelphia Eagles 20, at Green Bay Packers 53
This game was more about the Packers than the Eagles. Right now, it doesn’t look like there’s a team in the world that can slow down the Packers’ offense.
Line: Nice game by the Packers but what was with those throwback uniforms? SO UGLY!
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 16, AT 8:30 P.M. ET
New England Patriots 42, at Indianapolis Colts 20
Hmm. Things change fast in the NFL, but if you had to guess right now, a Green Bay Packers vs. New England Patriots Super Bowl would seem like a good bet. The Patriots don’t look beatable either.
Line: This game used to be the marquee matchup when it was Tom Brady vs. Peyton Manning. New Colts quarterback Andrew Luck is great but even he couldn’t live up to the spotlight.