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Cue Cards 9-2-14

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

Over the Weekend — August 29 to September 1

Harbingers of NFL Football — The professional football season starts this Thursday with one game and then this Sunday with a dozen others. Since the NFL is by far the most popular professional sports league, the upcoming season will likely dominate most water cooler type situations this week. Depending on where you live, your friends, family, and colleagues will be obsessing over the details of a different team but one national story that may spark conversation was the cutting of Michael Sam. Sam, the first openly gay football player to be drafted into the NFL was cut by the team that drafted him this weekend. The questions being asked are, “How much, if any, did being gay play into his being cut? And will he get a chance to play for real this season?”
College football went mostly as planned — As we covered last week, the first weekend of college football is full of easy games for the top twenty five teams in the country. As expected, only three of the top twenty five teams lost their first game, and those were the three (well, three of the six) teams that were brave enough to play another top twenty five team.
The U.S. Open rounds into shape — The major tennis tournament enters its second full week and has narrowed its field to eight women and twelve men. As has often been the case with tennis in the last few years, the male side of the bracket has been more predictable and all three of the favorites, Novak Djokovic, Andy Murray, and Roger Federer, are still alive. The women’s side, as has also been the pattern, is more fractured. Of the top seeds, only Serena Williams is still playing. Williams and Federer both have 17 major tournament victories during their wonderful careers. It would be great to see them both play for number 18.
The Basketball World Cup — The FIBA basketball world cup in Spain is underway and after two or three games in each group… nothing surprising has happened. Spain and the United States are still undefeated and look destined to play in the finals against each other. The United States did struggle against Turkey — they even trailed at half-time — but outscored Turkey 63 to 37 in the second half to win by a comfortable margin.

Cue Cards 8-29-14

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

Yesterday — Thursday, August 28

College Football Begins with a Splat — The first real day of college football was supposed to have at least two good, even “spinach” games. We even put out an infographic showing why. But, as they say, anything can happen on any given Sunday or even Thursday. Both games turned into blow outs with Texas A&M beating South Carolina 52-28 and Mississippi beating Boise State 35-13.
See Ya Ci Ci — The cinderella run of 15 year-old Ci Ci Bellis in the U.S. Open came to an end when she lost to Zarina Diyas. Her age finally came through in her play which was up and down and even more in the interview following her loss. When little leaguer Mo’Ne Davis was in the news recently, at least one of the narratives was “Should we be covering kids as closely as this? Is it good for them?” In tennis, where 15 year-olds can be professionals, that narrative is missing.
The NFL Adjusts — The NFL announced a new policy on domestic violence. A first offense will be answered with a six game suspension, a second offense with a “lifetime ban” although violators can apply for reinstatement. This policy will be applied to everyone who works under the league umbrella, not just players. It’s a clear response to the bad press that the NFL has received over the suspension of Baltimore Running Back, Ray Rice, who was given two games for domestic abuse.

Cue Cards 8-28-14

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

Yesterday — Wednesday, August 27

A Slew of Suspensions • #1 — NFL player Josh Gordon was finally suspended after a long appeals process for a full year because of testing positive for weed. The knee-jerk reaction is going to be to compare the length of his suspension for a non-violent offense to Ray Rice’s two games after assaulting his fiancée. It’s a little bit of a false comparison because the penalties for substance abuse were collectively bargained for and agreed to by the owners and the players union. Also, the chemicals in an athletes body seem more reasonably the jurisdiction of a sports league interested in protecting the fairness of their competition than any crime off the field, no matter how horrible. Then again, weed seems to be on its way to being legalized most everywhere and sexual assault is really, really, really awful. Maybe the knee-jerk reaction is the right one.
A Slew of Suspensions • #2 — University of Southern California football player John Shaw has been suspended indefinitely after admitting his story about spraining his ankles while saving his nephew from drowning was a lie. The indefinite duration probably has something to do with the fact that the true story of the ankle sprains is still either not known or not known publicly. This type of blundering is a good way to remind ourselves, right before the college football season starts, that as much as they look like grown, professional, super-hero athletes, college athletes are still basically kids.
A Slew of Suspensions • # 3 — The University of North Carolina has suspended four of their college football players after an “alleged hazing incident that left walk-on freshman wideout Jackson Boyer with a concussion.” Not much to really say about this one. Even if it wasn’t hazing, it sounds like assault. I suppose it’s helpful to also remember that there are around 125 college students on each of the 125 (symmetry not intended) division one college football teams in the country. That’s 15,625 men from age 18 to 22 who, when they get into trouble, are going to be in the news.
Actual Sports • U.S. Open Upsets — Heat and humidity fray the nerves of even the most casual commuter in New York. So it’s no surprise that it works its evil on tennis players sprinting around mid-day for two to five hours. Two big names on the women’s side of the U.S. Open lost yesterday to relative unknowns. Number four ranked Aga Radwanska lost to Peng Shuai and Sloan Stephens lost to Johanna Larsson.

Cue Cards 8-27-14

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

Yesterday — Tuesday, August 26

Almost Perfect — A very rare and exciting thing in Baseball is a “Perfect Game.” This is when a pitcher pitches the entire game without allowing a single person from the other team to get to first base. Not even who! San Francisco Giants’ pitcher Madison Bumgarner had a perfect game through seven innings but allowed a hit in the eighth. No one else got on base though and that runner did not score. It was still an impressive and notable performance by Bumgarner.
Strong Little Fifteen — The U.S. Open’s opening round was enlivened yesterday when fifteen year-old CiCi Bellis from California beat the tenth ranked player in the world, Dominika Cibulkova. When told after the game that she was trending on twitter, Bellis said, “I know some of my friends were doing hashtag like ‘takedowncibulkova,’ something like that,” she said. “I know three of my friends did that.”
Sports as Soap Opera — Two interesting non-game-based sports stories developed further yesterday. One is heartening — Michael Sam, the first openly gay professional football player, made it through the first round of cuts on his team. Still, his team has to go from 75 players to 53 by this Sunday, so we’ll have another week of watching this story before things are settled. The other story is bizarre — a couple days ago, USC football player John Shaw hurtled into the news when he explained to his team that he had sprained both his ankles badly by jumping from a balcony onto concrete to save his nephew from drowning in a pool. As the story became big news, it also became… suspect. Now the story is that USC has started to back away slowly with its hands held up, gesturing to the world that they don’t know what happened and aren’t fully supporting Shaw until they know more.

Cue Cards 8-26-14

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

Yesterday — Monday, August 25

Traditional Hegemony Trickling Back in Baseball? One of the unique and refreshing things about this season in Major League Baseball is that most of the traditional powers have been struggling and some teams that have been very bad for decades have been doing well. The two extreme examples have been the New York Yankees who are the winningest team ever but have not been good this year and the Kansas City Royals who have been one of the sorriest teams for the past thirty years but are doing great this season. Yesterday the two played each other and the Yankees won 8-1. This was their fifth win in a row and makes me wonder/worry if there’s enough time left in the incredibly long baseball season for things to turn back around.
The U.S. Open Begins — Big tennis tournaments usually start pretty quietly. There’s enough predictability in tennis and the tournaments are big enough that the first few rounds are usually pretty easy for the big names who get to play much less well known names. The most common story (until there is an upset) will be how some well-known player almost lost or, when that’s not possible, how the well-known player had to try harder than expected. In day one, Andy Murray had to try harder than expected against Robin Haase and Venus Williams had to try harder than expected against Kimiko Date-Krumm and an annoying bumble bee.
Rematch of British Titans — Last year’s English Premier League Champions, Manchester City, and Runners-Up, Liverpool, played yesterday afternoon. This might explains some funny furtive departures from the office in mid-afternoon and then more funny returns smelling slightly like ale. The defending champions trounced Liverpool 3-1 and from watching part of this game, I can tell you that it wasn’t even that close. Manchester City dominated almost as much as Germany did Brazil way back a few months ago. The English Premier League is fun to watch but mostly makes me miss the World Cup.

Cue Cards: 8-25-14

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

Yesterday — Sunday, August 24

Sam Bradford’s Knee — St. Louis Rams Quarterback Sam Bradford tore his ACL and will miss the entire upcoming National Football League season. Bradford was the last quarterback drafted under the previous collective bargaining agreement when rookies made way more money than they do now, so, as upsetting as it is to lose your team’s starting quarterback before the season even starts for Rams fans, at least this means the team will definitely move on to a more affordable quarterback option next year.
Angels beat the Athletics — It’s rare that the two best teams in any sport are in the same division. In baseball right now, the two teams with the best records are not only in the same division but in the same state. The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (or whatever they’re actually called these days) beat the Oakland Athletics last night 9-4 to move into first place. Of all the major league sports, baseball has the fewest playoff teams, so this jockeying for position really does matter.
Sunderland ties Manchester United — The most famous team in the world, Manchester United, has a new manager this year, the way-out-there Dutch Louis Van Gaal. In two games so far this season, they still haven’t won with him at the helm. Yesterday they drew with the decidedly mediocre Sunderland. Let’s all just wait quietly for the Van Gaalian eruption to happen.

Cue Cards 1-6-14: NFL One Liners

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

On Mondays during in the fall, the conversation is so dominated by NFL football that the expression “Monday morning quarterback” has entered the vernacular. The phrase is defined by google as “a person who passes judgment on and criticizes something after the event.” With the popularity of fantasy football, we now have Monday morning quarterbacks talking about football from two different perspectives. We want you to be able to participate in this great tradition, so all fall we’ll be running NFL One Liners in our cue cards series on Monday. Use these tiny synopses throughout the day:

NFL One Liners

The first week of the playoffs!

Indianapolis 45, Kansas City 44 — The closest, most back-and-forth game in a weekend full of closely contested games, people will be talking about:

How Chiefs coach Andy Reid stayed true to his nature by wasting his team’s time-outs which left them unable to possibly get the ball back for one last shot at the end of the fourth quarter.
How Colts quarterback Andrew Luck stayed true to his nature by leading his team’s unbelievable comeback from 28 points down in the third quarter.
How many injuries the Chiefs sustained to important players, especially star running back Jamal Charles who left the game very early with a head injury and did not return.

What’s next: The Colts go up to New England to play the Patriots next Saturday night at 8:15 on CBS. The Colts and the Patriots have had many memorable meetings in the playoffs in the last 15 years but all of them involved Peyton Manning who is now playing for the Broncos.

Philadelphia 24, New Orleans 26 — Saturday’s night game also came down to the wire. People will be talking about:

All week the narrative was that the Saints had trouble winning on the road and in the cold, both of which they just did. So much for that.
The Saints were able to “win” the battle of the offensive line and defensive line. On defense they found a way to hold the Eagles great running game to not-so-many yards and on offense they ran for 175 yards and only allowed two sacks.
The overriding factor in this game might have been experience. The Saints quarterback and coach have been together since 2006. The Eagles coach and quarterback were new to each other and (more or less) the NFL this season.

What’s next: The Saints travel to Seattle to play the Seahawks, Saturday 4:35 on Fox. This is a rematch of a memorable playoff game from 2011 which the Seahawks won 41 – 36.

Cincinnati 10, San Diego 27 — The one lopsided game of the weekend was the early game on Sunday. People will be talking about:

How the Chargers barely made the playoffs. They needed two other teams to lose last weekend just for them to have a chance.
How the quarterback of the Bengals, Andy Dalton, really blew it. Dalton has blown it in the playoffs before, so now it’s a pattern, which is never good. Plus he has red hair, which seems to be a magnet for criticism. Editorial note: he really did blow it. He threw two bad interceptions and fumbled the ball in the second half.

What’s next: A rematch of the week 15 (two weeks ago) game that started the Charger’s run to the playoffs. They travel to Denver to play the Broncos Sunday, 4:40 on CBS. The Chargers and the Broncos are division rivals but have surprisingly never played in the playoffs.

Green Bay 20, San Francisco 23 — The last of the four games was an icy affair in Green Bay. People will be talking about:

How the 49ers seem to have the Packers’ number. This makes three straight defeats starting with last year’s playoff game. This one was closer but still.
How all three of the outside, cold weather games were won by teams from California and New Orleans. So much for home-field and home-environment advantage.
How the 49ers are a tougher, bigger, more physical team than the Packers.

What’s next: The 49ers travel to North Carolina to play the Panthers on Sunday at 1:05 on Fox. The Panthers are the East Coast equivalent of the 49ers — big, strong, with an incredible defense and a young, talented, running quarterback.

Cue Cards 12-30-13: NFL One Liners

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

NFL One Liners

The last week of the regular season!

Cincinnati 34, Baltimore 17 — In what was a bit of a recurring theme for today, the Ravens needed to win this game to qualify for the playoffs and they seemed almost hamstrung by needing it so badly. The Bengals beat them soundly.

Pittsburgh 20, Cleveland 7 — The Steelers were the longest of the four teams in the AFC that had a chance to get the last playoff spot. They needed to win and have Baltimore, Miami, and San Diego lose. They came, so, so close.

Atlanta 20, Carolina 21 — This is the kind of game that illustrates how the NFL has more parity than any other league. The not-so-good Falcons gave the very-good Panthers a run for their money.

Minnesota 14, Detroit 13 — Having been eliminated from playoff contention last week in ignominious fashion, this was the cherry on top of the poop for Lions fans.

Tennessee 16, Houston 10 — By losing this game, the Texans clinched possession of the number one draft pick in next year’s NFL draft which goes to the team with the worst record. At least now Texans fans have something interesting to think about.

Indianapolis 30, Jacksonville 10 — Recently Super Bowls have been won by teams, like Baltimore last year, that haven’t been dominant during the regular season. The Colts have a little bit of that feel to them… but they could also just lose in the first round next weekend. Who knows?

Miami 7, New York Jets 20 — Miami was the worst of the teams that needed to win and just couldn’t do it. The Jets, despite seeming awful for most of the year, end on a high note by eliminating their rivals from the playoffs.

New York Giants 20, Washington 6 — This adds fuel to the fire of people claiming that Redskins coach Mike Shanahan is trying to get fired.

New England 34, Buffalo 20 — Ho hum, Tom Brady, Bill Bellichick, and the New England Patriots have their 13th winning season in a row. The next longest streak in the NFL is four.

Chicago 28, Green Bay 33 — This was one of two de-facto playoff games where the winner of the game would make the playoffs and the loser would be out. It was a great game with lots of drama and lead-changes, and it came down to some last minute heroics by star Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers who came back this weekend after missing seven weeks with a broken collar bone.

Oakland 14, Denver 34 — The Broncos and their quarterback Peyton Manning finished their record breaking season by breaking all kinds of records. The Raiders… not so much.

San Diego 27, Kansas City 24 — This was probably the weirdest game of the day. This game meant literally nothing to the Chiefs, who couldn’t move up or down in playoff seeding, and everything to the Chargers who knew they just needed to win to make the playoffs. The Chiefs benched almost all of their starters and still almost beat the Chargers in overtime. Fans in San Diego and Pittsburgh (which would have made the playoffs if the Chargers had lost) spent three and a half hours in agony.

New Orleans 42, Tampa Bay 17 — The Saints had to win to ensure a playoff spot and they certainly were convincing.

Arizona 20, San Francisco 23 — It must have been tough for the Cardinals players to concentrate knowing that they needed to win and have the Saints lose to make the playoffs. The Cardinals have the unwanted mantle of best team to miss the playoffs.

Seattle 27, St. Louis 9 — Last week I wrote that for some reason I still don’t think the Seahawks are very good. I still don’t. I will continue to write this until after they win the Super Bow.

Dallas 22, Philadelphia 24 — This was the second win-or-go-home game of the day and, like the Bears vs. Packers, it was an exciting game. The Cowboys continued their soap-opera-ish ways by losing their starting quarterback, Tony Romo, to back surgery in the week preceding this game. They still almost had enough to sneak by the Eagles and make the playoffs.

Cue Cards 12-23-13: NFL One Liners

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

NFL One Liners

At this point in the season, the plot of most games has to do with whether the teams in it will make the playoffs.

Miami 0, Buffalo 19 — By losing to the bottom feeding Bills, the Dolphins need to win next week and hope that Baltimore loses or (oddly) San Diego wins.

Minnesota 14, Cincinnati 42 — The Bengals officially clinched a playoff spot by beating the Vikings but there wasn’t much drama here — the Vikings were out and the Bengals all but surely in before the game even started.

Indianapolis 23, Kansas City 7 — Both these teams are going to make the playoffs; the wrinkle in this game is that they might play each other again in two weeks during the first round of the playoffs. Did the Colts “send a message” to the Chiefs? Or were the Chiefs not showing the Colts their best stuff to lull them into a false sense of security?

Tampa Bay 13, St. Louis 23 — Two bad teams that might both be good next year or the year after. The Rams have a bunch of good players and extra draft picks from a trade with the Redskins. The Buccaneers look like they have some great young players too.

Cleveland 13, New York Jets 24 — The future is a little less clearly bright for these two mediocre teams. Sorry Jets fans!

Dallas 24, Washington 23 — The soap opera of the NFC East (the division with these two teams plus the Giants and Eagles) continues. Star tragic hero and Cowboys quarterback, Tony Romo, threw a touchdown pass on fourth and goal (last chance!!) with a minute left in the game to go up by one point. The drama will conclude next week when the Cowboys play the Eagles Sunday night and whoever wins that game will qualify for the playoffs.

New Orleans 13, Carolina 17 — Another game between division rivals, albeit with a higher quality of play. By winning this game, the Panthers put themselves in a position where if they win next week, they get one of the top two positions in their conference playoffs which means they can take the first week of the playoffs off to rest and prepare. The Saints are likely to make the playoffs anyway.

Tennessee 20, Jacksonville 16 — This game didn’t mean anything for the playoffs. Not even a little bit.

Denver 37, Houston 13 — Broncos quarterback, Peyton Manning, broke the all-time NFL record for touchdown passes in a season by throwing his 51st of the year. Houston is 24th in the league with 19 touchdown passes for the year. Yikes.

New York Giants 23, Detroit 20 — The Lions cement their reputation as a talented but ultimately dumb and unsuccessful team by losing in over-time to the hapless Giants. The Lions are eliminated from the playoffs with this loss and their coach will surely be fired.

Arizona 17, Seattle 10 — The Cardinals did what no team has done since 2011 — travel to Seattle and win. This keeps the Cardinals playoff hopes alive and makes me happy because for some reason, despite several straight seasons of excellence, I still refuse to believe the Seahawks are good.

Pittsburgh 38, Green Bay 31 — The scenic game of the day, played in the snow in Green Bay, went down to the last two minutes when the Steelers scored to win it. This win keeps the Steelers playoff hopes alive (though barely) and means that the Packers game against the Bears next week will decide which of those two teams makes the playoffs.

Oakland 13, San Diego 26 — The Chargers are alive. The Raiders are not.

New England 41, Baltimore 7 — This was an odd result from a game that the Ravens needed to win for playoff positioning far more than the Patriots did. The Ravens aren’t eliminated but they need to win next week and have either the Chargers or Dolphins lose to get in.

Chicago 11, Philadelphia 54 — Maybe there’s a pattern here — the Bears, like the Ravens, needed to win this game far more than the Eagles did, and instead of that helping them, it seemed to hurt. There’s probably a life lesson in there somewhere, but I want to find it so badly that…

Cue Cards 12-16-13: NFL One Liners

Cue Cards is a series designed to assist with the common small talk about high-profile recent sporting events that is so omnipresent in the workplace, the bar, and other social settings.

NFL One Liners

Washington 26, Atlanta 27 — This game was a hysterical melodrama as acted by below average football teams. At one point in the game there were three turnovers on successive plays. In total there were seven fumbles! The Falcons won when the Redskins decided to try to win the game on a two point conversion in the final minute instead of tying the game and going to overtime.

Chicago 38, Cleveland 31 — The Bears coach made the brave decision to give the starting quarterback job back to Jay Cutler who had missed the past several games with an injury and whose replacement had been playing great. Cutler played well but not flawlessly and the coach would have taken a lot of criticism if the team had lost.

Houston 3, Indianapolis 25 — Ouch, sorry Texans.

New England 20, Miami 24 — This game will be seen as a referendum on the Patriots’ Super Bowl chances after losing their star tight-end, Rob Gronkowski for the season with torn knee ligaments at the end of the previous game.

Philadelphia 30, Minnesota 48 — Oh Philadelphia, after beating Detroit in the snow to take first place in their division last week, this game against the not-so-good Vikings should have been an easy win. Instead, third-string running back, Matt Asiata, who not even the most obsessive fantasy football fan had heard of before this week, ran for three touchdowns and the rout was on.

Seattle 23, New York Giants 0 — Talking about routs. Ugh. Not a great day in New York.

San Francisco 33, Tampa Bay 14 — The 49ers are a big strong team that beats up consistently on weaker teams like the Buccaneers.

Buffalo 27, Jacksonville 20 — The Bills won the game but at least half their fans are probably pissed at them for giving the Jaguars a better draft pick. Draft position is set in reverse order of standings, so a game like this between two teams at the bottom of the standings often has mixed incentives.

Kansas City 56, Oakland 31 — The Chiefs went up 21-3 in the first quarter and never let up.

New York Jets 20, Carolina 30 — Like I said before, not a good day in New York for the football inclined.

Green Bay 37, Dallas 36 — In hysterically typical fashion, the Cowboys who are known for blowing leads, and Tony Romo, who is known for throwing terrible interceptions at the worst possible moment, blew a 23 point lead aided by Tony Romo’s two interceptions in the last two minutes of the game.

Arizona 37, Tennessee 34 — It’s really a shame that division winners automatically get playoff spots because it means either the Eagles or the Cowboys will get in and Arizona, which is 9-5 but third place in their division, will probably miss out.

New Orleans 16, St. Louis 27 — The Rams, the fourth team in the NFC West with the Cardinals, 49ers, and Seahawks, showed its own strength by beating the 10-4 Saints.

Cincinnati 20, Pittsburgh 30 — Big brother reaches back in time and beats little brother even though the little brother Bengals are going to the playoffs while the big brother Steelers are going home early this year.