On Mondays during in the fall, the conversation is so dominated by NFL football that the expression “Monday morning quarterback” has entered the vernacular. The phrase is defined by Google as “a person who passes judgment on and criticizes something after the event.” With the popularity of fantasy football, we now have Monday morning quarterbacks talking about football from two different perspectives. We want you to be able to participate in this great tradition, so all fall we’ll be running NFL One Liners on Monday. Use these tiny synopses throughout the day:
Wildcard Weekend
Saturday, January 3, at 4:35 p.m. ET, on ESPN
Arizona Cardinals 16, at Carolina Panthers 27
The Cardinals could not overcome the loss of their best two quarterbacks during the season. The Panthers took advantage of Cardinals third string quarterback, Ryan Lindley, by interception two of his passes on their way to setting an NFL record for fewest yards allowed in a playoff game. It often seems like records like that are arbitrary but in this case, that’s basically all you need to know about the game: the Cardinals offense was completely impotent and no matter how valiantly they tried on defense, they could not overcome it.
Line: Hard to win when you can’t play offense.
Saturday, January 3, at 8:15 p.m. ET on NBC
Baltimore Ravens 30, at Pittsburgh Steelers 17
The story of the game according to most writers and commentators was how badly the Steelers missed their running back, Le’Veon Bell who missed the game with a knee injury. In my mind though, the most interesting part of the game was Pittsburgh’s last drive of the game. Down by two scores, the Steelers were desperately trying to score when quarterback Ben Roethlisberger and then a play or two later, Tight End Heath Miller were forced to leave the game with apparent head injuries. This seemed like the ultimate triumph of concussion awareness — to pull star players off the field in a pivotal drive of a playoff game would have been unthinkable in past years. But then, but then, after backup quarterback Bruce Gradkowski drove them down the field, Roethlisberger came back out and immediately threw an interception to lose the game. From what I know, you can’t actually test for a concussion in the amount of time he missed. So, how did he get back on the field? Did his team not take the concussion test seriously? If not, then why was he even missing for as long as he was? Also, when will teams learn that a healthy backup is better than a woozy, brain injured starter?
Line: The Steelers missed Bell all game but they might have had a chance at the end if they hadn’t stuck a potentially concussed quarterback back on the field.
Sunday, January 4, at 1:05 p.m. ET on CBS
Cincinnati Bengals 10, at Indianapolis Colts 26
Coming into this game, the narrative was all about a quarterback who can’t win big games (Andy Dalton of the Bengals) vs. a quarterback who loves playing in big games (Andrew Luck of the Colts.) Looks a lot like that narrative was confirmed by the outcome of this game although, of course, we know that football games are the product of somewhere around thirty people’s performances and not just one. The result was not unexpected but you would think it would force Cincinnati’s executives into making some difficult choices about their two most important employees, the coach and quarterback.
Line: It just seems like Cincinnati cannot win a playoff game. Did you know the last time they won a playoff game was 1990?
Sunday, January 4, at 4:40 p.m. ET on Fox
Detroit Lions 20, at Dallas Cowboys 24
The best game (and if we’re being honest about it, the only really good one) of the weekend was this one between the Detroit Lions and Dallas Cowboys. The Lions jumped out to a lead and spent most of the game playing from ahead. The game was billed as a battle between the Cowboys great offense and the Lions excellent defense, especially between their offensive and defensive lines. For most of the game, the Lions defensive line was winning that battle and frequently putting Cowboy’s quarterback Tony Romo under pressure or on his back. Finally, in the second half, Romo found a way to distribute the ball before being killed and the Cowboys pulled ahead. In the end, it was the Lions offense pushing the ball down the field in a last-ditch attempt against the Dallas defense. They came up short and the Cowboys advanced.
Line: Both teams have a reputation for coming up short in mind-bogglingly frustrating ways. Yesterday it was the Lions’ turn.
) than feel good about rooting for Winston. I think this is a pretty wide-spread belief (not the O.J. part) and that says moderately good things about our country. Winston has also never lost a college football game, and if he wins his last two this season before turning pro, he should probably be considered one of the best five players in college football history. Ouch. Marcus Mariota — As long as Mariota can get through the month without shredding his knees, he will be the first pick of next year’s NFL draft. He’s the prototypical modern quarterback. He’s tall (6’4″), fast (sub 4.5 seconds for the 40 yard dash, which is faster than you can imagine), and a good decision maker. If were were better than terrible at identifying good NFL quarterbacks, Mariota would be a sure thing. He’s also a senior, playing his third year for the Oregon Ducks (he sat out his freshman year.) When he won the Heisman trophy this year, he became the first Hawaiian born player to ever get that honor given to the best college football player each year. Mark Helfrich — Who? Right, that’s the point. Even sports fans don’t know who Mark Helfrich is. He’s the head coach of the Oregon Ducks. Reading this 