Tag: recaps

2015 NFL Championship Weekend One Liners

On Mondays during in the fall, the conversation is so dominated by NFL football that the expression “Monday morning quarterback” has entered the vernacular. The phrase is defined by Google as “a person who passes judgment on and criticizes something after the event.” With the popularity of fantasy football, we now have Monday morning quarterbacks talking about football from two different perspectives. We want you to be able to participate in this great tradition, so all fall we’ll be running NFL One Liners on Monday. Use these tiny synopses throughout the day:

Championship Weekend

Sunday, January 18, at 3:05 p.m. ET, on Fox

Green Bay Packers 22, at Seattle Seahawks 28

This game was one of the craziest football games I’ve ever seen. It’s probably going to have been one of the craziest football games your sports-fan friends or colleagues have ever seen either. The Seahawks were expected to win but came out incredibly flat in the first half. They couldn’t seem to do anything good on offense, and although their great defense was limiting the damage by holding the Packers to field goals on all but one Packers’ possession, things looked bleak for Seattle. At half-time the score was 16-0 in favor of the Packers. The Seahawks played better in the second half but it wasn’t until late in the fourth quarter that crazy things started to happen. With a little less than four minutes remaining in the game, the Seahawks were down by 12 points. They drove down the field, got a touchdown. Now they were down by five points with a little more than two minutes left. They attempted an onside kick, which is when they kick the ball off but instead of kicking it all the way down the field for the other team to get, they kick it mostly sideways and up in the air and try to run down the field to get it themselves. This move, which works about 20% of the time, was successful. The Seahawks got the ball, and very quickly moved it down the field to get another touchdown! Now they are up by one point and decide to go for a two point conversion to make the lead three instead. This move, which is successful about 50% of the time, also worked out for the Seahawks. So, the Seahawks have a three point lead but there’s almost a minute and a half left in the game. The Packers get the ball, and tie the game with a field goal to send it to overtime. In overtime, the Seahawks get the ball and score a touchdown to win the game.

Line to say to football fans: Whoa! That was the craziest game ever!
Line to say to Seahawks fans: You never gave up hope? That was so courageous of you and your team paid you back!
Line to say to Packers fans: I am so, so sorry. Can I buy you lunch today?

Sunday, January 18, at 6:40 p.m. ET, on CBS

Indianapolis Colts 7, at New England Patriots 45

This game had none of the drama of the earlier game. The two teams had played earlier this season and the Patriots won 42-20 mostly because they Colts could not stop them from running the ball whenever and wherever they wanted to. Despite New England coach, Bill Belichick’s, well-deserved reputation for creatively inventing new game plans to match every situation his team is in, when something works, he’s not afraid to go back to it. The Colts could not stop the Patriot’s run game in this game either. Patriots running back LeGarrette Blount ran for 148 yards and three touchdowns. The game was played under somewhat strange circumstances, an unseasonably warm but fierce rain-storm and potentially with under-inflated balls (Yahoo Sports went with the clever “deflate-gate” rather than the obvious “ball-gate”) but you get the feeling that nothing was going to stop the Patriots in this game.

Line to say to football fans: The second game wasn’t quite as much fun as the first, huh?
Line to say to Patriots fans: How you feeling about facing the Seahawks in the Super Bowl?
Line to say to Colts fans: Hard to lose but better in some ways to lose that way than the way the Packers lost.

What’s Next: The Super Bowl! New England Patriots vs. Seattle Seahawks on Sunday, February 1, 6:30 p.m. on NBC. Tons of coverage on our website in the next two weeks.

If you want to learn the basics of football in time for this year’s Super Bowl, sign up for our Football 101 course. It’s the easiest way to learn football, and I promise that by the time you’re through, you’ll be able to impress the football fan in your life with your newfound knowledge.

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Week 17 NFL One Liners

On Mondays during in the fall, the conversation is so dominated by NFL football that the expression “Monday morning quarterback” has entered the vernacular. The phrase is defined by Google as “a person who passes judgment on and criticizes something after the event.” With the popularity of fantasy football, we now have Monday morning quarterbacks talking about football from two different perspectives. We want you to be able to participate in this great tradition, so all fall we’ll be running NFL One Liners on Monday. Use these tiny synopses throughout the day:

Week 17

Sunday, December 28, at 1:00 p.m. ET

Buffalo Bills 17, at New England Patriots 9 

Winning football games is hard and tiring and bruising. The Patriots had no need to win this game because no combination of results this weekend could have kept them from being the top team in the AFC and guaranteed to host all of the games they play in the playoffs until the Super Bowl.
Line: The Patriots didn’t need it, so they didn’t win it.

Cleveland Browns 10, at Baltimore Ravens 20

The Ravens needed to win this game and have a couple other things happen in the early games to make the playoffs. While they were winning the game, the other couple things happened. They’re in!
Line: The Ravens needed some help to get into the playoffs but what they could control (beating the Browns,) they did control.

Chicago Bears 9, at Minnesota Vikings 13

What a lost season from the Chicago Bears. They were expected to make the playoffs and instead, they only won five games. The Vikings can feel moderately good about themselves. They won seven games this year while mostly playing a rookie quarterback.
Line: There’s be hope today in Minnesota but the same can’t be said for Chicago.

Dallas Cowboys 44, at Washington Redskins 17

The Cowboys wanted to win this game in order to better their playoff seed. Still, you get the feeling that even if they hadn’t wanted to win, they might have won anyway. That’s how deeply depressing this season was for Washington.
Line: Hey, if you’re feeling sad about the end of the NFL regular season, just think — at least it means no more watching the Redskins!

Jacksonville Jaguars 17, at Houston Texans 23

The Texans are this year’s hard-luck team. They’re going to just miss out on the playoffs, but you have to wonder what would have been if they hadn’t been forced to go down to their third quarterback… when their first two weren’t that good to start out with!
Line: I feel bad for the Texans — I wish they could have snuck into the playoffs.

Indianapolis Colts 27, at Tennessee Titans 10

The Colts didn’t really have any reason to win this game, but after losing so badly last week, this must have felt somewhat cathartic. The Titans wanted to lose to try to get the first pick in next year’s draft, but unfortunately for them, Tampa Bay lost also to clinch that first pick for themselves.
Line: Meaningless victory for the Colts.

San Diego Chargers 7, at Kansas City Chiefs 19

By beating the San Diego Chargers, the Kansas City Chiefs knocked them out of the playoffs. Too bad for the Chiefs that the Ravens were simultaneously knocking them out of the playoffs.
Line: Talk about bitter-sweet victories. No one watching this game ended up happy.

New York Jets 37, at Miami Dolphins 24

Playing the day after reports surfaced that Jets head coach Rex Ryan had already cleaned his office out in the expectation of being fired, the Jets finally looked good on offense.
Line: Ha! Maybe Rex Ryan was so busy cleaning out his office that he didn’t have time to ruin the offensive game plan.

New Orleans Saints 23, at Tampa Bay Buccaneers 20

The Saints counter-intuitively helped a division rival by beating the Buccaneers today and therefore ensuring that they will pick first in next year’s NFL draft. The draft is no sure thing, but the Buccaneers fans are happier today than the Saints fans.
Line: It’s a hard call — do you try to lose to keep a rival from getting the first pick?

Philadelphia Eagles 34, at New York Giants 26

The season ends for these teams the way it’s been all along. The Eagles are marginally better than the Giants, but neither are good enough to compete with the best in the NFL.
Line: The tri-state area gets shut out from the playoffs.

SUNDAY, December 28, AT 4:05 and 4:25 P.M. ET

Carolina Panthers 34, at Atlanta Falcons 3

Well, that wasn’t close. The Panthers beat the Falcons to win the NFC South and clinch a playoff spot. Despite having a losing record, the Panthers look like a dangerous team. They’ve won their last four games and because they are a division winner, they’ll get to host their first playoff game.
Line: Wouldn’t it just be so typical of the NFL if the Panthers made a run in this year’s playoffs?

Oakland Raiders 14, at Denver Broncos 47

The Broncos left nothing up to chance when it came to making sure they got a bye week.
Line: Peyton Manning wanted to rest up. Or maybe just film some more commercials!

Detroit Lions 20, at Green Bay Packers 30

Aaron Rodgers gave the Packers fans a scare when he went down (while throwing a touch down, mind you,) grabbing his calf. He’ll have an extra week to rest and recuperate thanks to this victory over the Lions which clinched a first round bye in the playoffs.
Line: Aaron Rodgers is remarkable.

Arizona Cardinals 17,  at San Francisco 49ers 20

The Cardinals are struggling mightily and valiantly to win games with their third quarterback starting. It’s not working.
Line: I know they’ll probably lose, but I can’t help but root for the Cardinals in the playoffs.

St. Louis Rams 6, at Seattle Seahawks 20

The Seahawks clinched the number one seed in their conference, and (like the Patriots in theirs) home field throughout the playoffs.
Line: The poor Rams — so decent and so trapped in a division with way better than decent teams.

SUNDAY, December 21, AT 8:30 P.M. ET

Cincinnati Bengals 17, at Pittsburgh Steelers 27

By winning this game, the Steelers won their division and will now host the Baltimore Ravens in the first round of the playoffs. By losing, the Bengals need to travel to Indianapolis in the first round. It’s not clear to me that there’s that much of a competitive advantage to hosting Baltimore over traveling to Indianapolis. It’s certainly not worth losing your best offensive player for, which is exactly what happened to both teams. Steelers running back, Le’veon Bell left the game with a knee injury and Bengals wide receiver, A.J. Green, left with a possible concussion.
Line: In this case, I don’t think the playoff seeding was worth the collateral damage.

Week 14 NFL One Liners

On Mondays during in the fall, the conversation is so dominated by NFL football that the expression “Monday morning quarterback” has entered the vernacular. The phrase is defined by Google as “a person who passes judgment on and criticizes something after the event.” With the popularity of fantasy football, we now have Monday morning quarterbacks talking about football from two different perspectives. We want you to be able to participate in this great tradition, so all fall we’ll be running NFL One Liners on Monday. Use these tiny synopses throughout the day:

Week 14

Sunday, December 7, at 1:00 p.m. ET

Baltimore Ravens 28, at Miami Dolphins 13

The Dolphins went up early in this game and then… well, maybe they got distracted by Christmas shopping? Not sure how else to explain the total collapse that followed.
Line: So much for the Dolphins being a playoff team. They might still make it but they shouldn’t.

Indianapolis Colts 25, at Cleveland Browns 24

This was the heartbreaker of the day. The Browns really deserved to win this game after outplaying the Colts for at least two-thirds of the game despite being mildly outclassed.
Line: Cleveland doesn’t deserve more sports heartbreak but they sure get it often enough.

Pittsburgh Steelers 42, at Cincinnati Bengals 21

After a couple years of the Bengals outpacing the Steelers, it seems like the world is being brought back to normalcy. The Steelers traditionally beat the Bengals.
Line: Big Ben beat the Bengals. (Ten times fast.)

Tampa Bay Buccaneers 17, at Detroit Lions 34

It wasn’t more than a handful of years ago that the Lions were like the Buccaneers — perennial losers who can’t seem to win no matter what they do.
Line: My, how things have changed in Detroit.

Houston Texans 27, at Jacksonville Jaguars 13

The Texans keep themselves in the playoff race with this victory but you get the sense that is more of a mathematical reality than a realistic one.
Line: The Texans are just good enough to consistently beat the bad teams, which was more than good enough today.

New York Jets 24, at Minnesota Vikings 30

Quietly, after beating the hapless New York Jets in overtime, the Vikings are 6-7 and flirting with .500. That’s not bad for a team that has looked almost as bad as the very worst teams in the league at times this year.
Line: The Vikings might be sneaky good. The Jets coaches should be sneaking back home so they don’t get fired when they get off the plane.

New York Giants 36, at Tennessee Titans 7

I think that long time Giants coach Tom Coughlin might retire after this season even if he doesn’t get fired, but it’s a real credit to him the way his players rally around him even when there’s no hope left for this season.
Line: The Giants are down and out but at least they’re not the Titans.

St. Louis Rams 24, at Washington Redskins 0

Did I say “the Giants are down and out but at least they’re not the Titans”? I meant, “at least they’re not the Redskins”. What an insanely decrepit and dysfunctional organization.
Line: I think the Redskins unfavorables just passed the Congress’. And that’s saying something!

SUNDAY, December 7, AT 4:05 and 4:25 P.M. ET

Buffalo Bills 17, at Denver Broncos 24

I don’t understand what NFL god has it out for the Bills. First they get stuck in a division forever with the Patriots. Then, the one year they’re half-decent and have a shot to make the playoffs, they are somehow scheduled to play against the Broncos just when they need a win? Gah.
Line: I guess it’s true — if it weren’t for bad luck, the Bills would have no luck at all.

 

Kansas City Chiefs 14, at Arizona Cardinals 17

Wow — this was the most exciting game of the day if you go by importance to the overall playoff picture. At halftime, the ascendant Chiefs looked ascendant and the collapsing Cardinals looked collapsy. But then the Cardinals scored 11 points in the third quarter and shut the Chiefs out for the entire second half and flipped the script.
Line: Things change fast in the NFL. Now the Cardinals look like they might have enough to hold off the Seahawks for the division lead and the Chiefs look like they’re in trouble.

San Francisco 49ers 13, at Oakland Raiders 24

All year, the story hovering around the 49ers has been that the potential departure of their coach Jim Harbaugh has been negatively affecting their play. This week, rumors that the 49ers might trade him to the Raiders were buzzing. After today’s game, Harbaugh might not mind going across the bay to Oakland.
Line: Harbaugh might as well just stay in Oakland after this game.

Seattle Seahawks 24, at Philadelphia Eagles 14

After winning the Super Bowl last year, the Seahawks started slow this year but now it’s December and they are starting to look decidedly unbeatable again.
Line: I guess that Super Bowl hangover has lifted.

SUNDAY, December 7, AT 8:30 P.M. ET

New England Patriots 23, at San Diego Chargers 14

Another close game at half-time where one team shut the other out in the second half to win. That must be all the rage these days because I think it happened two or three times yesterday. In this game it was the Patriots who shut the Chargers out in the second half while they scored 10 points of their own in the fourth quarter.
Line: I’m sure there’s some stat about the Patriots not losing two games in a row very many times over the past fifteen years while Tom Brady has been quarterback and Bill Bellichick has been coach.